My Crazy Imagination Of Nostalgia Critic Reviewing Gekisou Sentai Carranger!
Well I remembered seeing the Power Rangers Turbo review of Doug Walker and yes, I can agree that movie was horrible but I still respect the fans who like the movie. I can still watch the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers movie and not get a headslam moment but... Turbo was a different issue. Again, you know my biases and some things that make me do stupid stuff right? Now moving on to this "mentally challenging" post. Take note, Carranger is only available with fan subs and no official DVD is available. For a related post, read my Doug Walker vs. Zyuranger post.
Whenever I hear that Carranger saved Super Sentai and Power Rangers Turbo was a really down season, so I guess that's a shocker. Even I was shocked whenever certain people praise Carranger as a series that made Super Sentai recover from the backlash during Ohranger. I think it's a great series but at the same time, it's very worthy of making fun of considering that the series makes fun of itself in several levels of WTF. Now it's time for some possible funny stuff that could happen. My imagined opening is that he thinks it's Power Rangers Turbo but finds out he's in a totally different show.
Doug could start off with Dappu or the Carrangers. He might say, "Well that fits the theme better than the Turbo movie. I mean, these people freaking work in a garage so they're normally, the best candidates for Car Magic power. Hmmm I thought Dappu no matter how funny I think he looks actually appeals to me more than Lerigot ever did in the Power Rangers Turbo movie because he actually got a group of hesitant heroes to fight for him... but he didn't have to play possum! He could have shown them what's going on and what could happen if they didn't fight."
I think he might start to make fun of the stupidity of the Bowzock by saying, "So the Bowzock are what you'd say living in that big spaceball. Hmmm that's new and they're not ina submarine. So we see Carranger's version of Divatox... WOW HOT!" I always thought of him making fun of Divatox's cleavage in his review was funny but I'd expect a much deeper jaw drop reaction for the sake of laughs. Then he might say, "Well these villains want to blow up the Earth but rather than drop a bomb or anything, they're so stupid they never come up with a good plan. Also to make their monsters grow, they buy Imo Yokan's potato jelly who is oh so oblivious to their plans. Doesn't anybody here use their brain... maybe except for Natsumi?!"
I guess if anything is worth poking fun at is, it's the Red Racer/Zonette comedy love story. He might really say something, "Hmmmm why do we keep getting the cliche of falling in love with hero identities and not the person behind the mask? If you ask me, I think it's somewhat awkward that Zonette starts to fall for Red Racer, unaware that he's the monkey faced civilian... pretty mean comment if you ask me! But then again, what do you expect from the villain? I always thought it's too cliche to fall in love with masked heroes, unaware of their human identities. It still doesn't make sense regardless where it happens."
I guess it's time to expect Doug insert all the Robocop footage and jokes when it's time for Signalman to arrive then he says, "Wait? So he even has to stop on a red pedestrian light just because... he keeps everything by the book? So really, how do you expect to capture a criminal with that?!" A possible joke he might say before criticizing Signalman is, "So here we have ROBOCOP! Ahhh... finally we're getting somewhere. Oh wait, this isn't Robocop? Just who is this guy?! So he's Signalman, apparently he's some Robocop-inspired character who for some reason, got into this fic." He might even do the jaw drop when Signalman's wife and son are shown and say, "So wait? Even his family looks like Robocop? What in the world is going on here?! Everyone's Robocop from where he comes from?" then insert Robocop footage, "Oh wait, hmmm Toei does love Robocop don't they?!"
I guess he might really have a lot of fun nitpicking on Instructor Ritchhiker but more importantly, on the ridiculous plans and say, "Really? You hired a guy to teach you to be evil and no real plans were made? But as you see, the Bowzock have this WTF festival that powers him up, kicks out Gynamo and Zonette, still I just wonder how in the world aren't people noticing anything weird about the aliens? Come on, you've been attacked at a daily basis and you can't recognize anything? Anyway the Carrangers lost RV Robo because Dappu for some reason has to hibernate but... luckily, the VRV Master arrives and gives then the VRV Robo which they use for rescue missions. Pretty neat actually and the Bowzock returns back to being stupid."
I guess what he might make fun off is Exhaus' sudden appearance, "So we realize that the Bowzocks were, well under some kind of bigger power that apparently, was always there and not even the audience knew he was there or, was there a hint and I didn't see it? Gynamo being the moron he is dares to challenge this huge supernatural being that we see, has been responsible for just about everything. Oh really, should I just have to mention that he was the one who really manipulated the Bowzock. Really, how moronic can get they get? So we later discover something was so unusual that, well, wait... so these guys blew up Dappu's planet because of some stupid astrology prediction done by Exhaus? I guess those Bowzock are really so dumb, they'd probably do anything for the sake of evil. Besides, Gynamo isn't so smart that even if he's the president, Zonette actually runs the show while she later sees the Red Racer's true identity, loving him for his entire person."
I would maybe have him say, "I'll admit Kyousuke did a brave awesome move fighting the monster out of suit but it was freaking reckless of him. I could compare that to a knight who fights a dragon without his armor to prove his love for the princess but I'll admit, it does come out pretty good with how the fight took place, yeah... it's better than Quest for Camelot and I'll say, Kyousuke should be in the knights of the round table. However, Exhaus of course is no softie as he betrays the Bowzock and decides to take matters into his hands. I'll admit, the Carrangers decided to risk themselves to get back their Car Magic... isn't that like Independence Day or what?" then we see the finale of Independence Day make a scene. However, Exhaus isn't so done yet and he returns, wrecking havoc and blasting all the mecha. I'll admit, that scene totally beats the finale part of the Turbo movie. However, in a stroke of luck, Gynamo and his pals who are now reformed, helps out even more. Gynamo throws out some expired sweet potato jelly at the mouth of Exhaus, causing him to shrink and BOOM, the Carrangers take him down with a hyper dash."
That's just a few of what Nostalgia Critic might make fun off when reviewing Carranger. As much as I love watching the series, I still can't help but poke fun at almost everyone because... the show's value is in its unusual style of writing by genius Yoshio Urasawa. So I expect maybe he might say at the end, "Well, it's a nice entertaining film and even if I can't really understand Japanese culture, I guess it's safe to say this was the series that saved Super Sentai! So I guess it's really a silly show, I can't help but laugh at the silliness but the whole series, is a must watch for me."
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